If you could go back in time and give your younger self advice, what would it be?
If I could go back in time and give my younger self advice, my first question would be: How far back are we talking?
Five? Ten? Nineteen? Twenty-seven? Thirty-seven?
And how much time do we have? Because depending on which version of me we’re visiting, this could take a while.
First, stop holding your pee. The world can wait. Besides, you look ridiculous dancing around. GO PEE!
Second, your eyelashes. Girl, put that medieval torture device down. They’re eyelashes, not window blinds.
Beyond that, I think we’re good.
Although, before I agree to this trip, who’s paying for it?
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